I've taught it before. It has been a while, but I've no doubt I can do it again.
[Zhian had come so far she taught him how to properly defend even. He was proud of her and missed her dearly...]
Mm. It is difficult to explain, but you seem to be in a better mood since taking this on. So, I will give everything I have to make this a success. For you and those who will benefit from it.
It's going to go just fine. I trust you to know what you're doing.
[His marked right hand fidgeted slightly as he dropped it from his face.]
I want this to go well. I believe that it will and I'm excited to be able to teach under my real name for once. It's only...I just want to do something that isn't 'catastrophically fuck up', which is the majority of what I've been doing back home lately.
[Takame was sure he could do it, but he was still eager to live up to the expectations. He didn't know how bad things were in Waver's home, shuddered even to imagine how bad it was given his supposed state upon return.
Still...]
You will succeed. You are qualified to handle something like this, you have the experience and the good judgment to know who and what will benefit students. You have the knowledge of both magic and life practice that anyone new to the supernatural would require.
I do not consider myself anyone... relevant. [Even in his world, he was just a meaningless ronin and his title of Warrior of Light felt undeserved.] But I believe in you, Waver.
[Waver frowned, picking up his cane long enough to lightly tap the handle against Takame's chest in mock admonishment.]
Don't be absurd. Memory or not, you had the strength to stand against Lancelot and the courage to try regardless. You were right there with me doing that stupid shit with the Metaverse so no one else would have to get hurt. I've never seen you be anything but supportive and protective towards those in need of it since I met you. I of all people don't give a fuck about relevance--that doesn't measure anything worthwhile.
[After all, he was born worthless--and where had he ended up? With the undying loyalty of a hero, with all the power of the one who had so coldly written him off, and the resolve to try to protect the world.]
[...That meant something. He was sure enough of that much, now.]
What matters is intent, and things like experience and judgment will follow with the time taken to learn them. I can't do this alone, and I believe in you to help others learn what I can't teach them. If you're uneasy about that, fine--but know you don't have anything to fear so long as you approach this with the same wholehearted compassion I've seen from you time and time again.
[A mock admonishment was still enough to briefly scare Takame. Did he say something wrong? Did he offend? His tail stiffened completely until the actual intent was shared.
He did listen, tail returning to a natural sway the more Waver spoke. Takame had meant to lift Waver up, he didn't realize he'd said something about himself that would make him need that.]
[He didn't mean to say the wrong thing. He was obsessed with not saying the wrong thing, but in doing so he was merely corrected and not punished. Years after he'd escaped from his past the fear still weighed heavy on him.
But here they were, picking one another up. And the thought in Takame's mind of how brilliant a Scion Waver would be came to mind again. Takame wanted desperately to be a good person, even if it wouldn't erase the bad he's done.
He's always carried genuine intent to help, even if he'd didn't think to describe it as "compassion". First it was his sister's wish and its become his own. He would try to hold the kind words he received close that one day he could believe them. Regardless of whether he could or not, though...]
Throughout my life, everything I have committed to has been given every ounce of my effort and power. You can be certain that it will be the same here.
[He spoke with a small, genuine smile--perhaps more sincere for its astounding rarity.]
We'll back each other up on this and play it by ear as it goes along. But I'm absolutely certain you don't have anything to worry about where commitment's concerned. The rest should fall into place after that.
That's about how it worked out for me, and there's not even anyone out to kill us here. Easy, right?
[Most expressions for Takame were rare, his own smile especially so and yet in the infrequent moments it showed it was warm and reassuring.]
Indeed. What we cannot manage alone can be done together. I will... be relying on you. And you may rely on me as well. [Said extending his hand. They were already working together, but something to... solidify it in a way. A means to say "here's to the future."]
[...It had been a mistake. Relying only on himself, pushing away everyone else that was ready and willing to work alongside him to see their insane enveavor through to whatever end, believing his problems were only his problems and should be handled as such-]
[All that matters is seeing this through to the end, you can easily do that without me.]
[Foolish. In striving to wear the iron armor of a mage around a human heart, he had utterly failed to understand that his missteps were their missteps. That it wasn't weakness to be unable to take every single thing on one's own shoulders, and it was not failure to stumble along the way.]
[You need not fight alone any longer, said a too-recent memory. And...was that really okay? Could he really stop himself from becoming that thing in that twisted dungeon? Stop himself from being like the silver-clad knight, or from the scarlet mage who commanded him?]
[...Maybe. But he was going to have to try to remember that it was no horrible transgression to take the offered hands to help him along the way.]
...Of course. [Having been briefly lost in thought, Waver seemed to shake something off before taking Takame's hand.] I...yeah. We'll figure it out together.
[With a nod Takame gave his hand a confident shake, but still tilted his head curiously. It spoke volumes about his level of comfort with Waver that he chose to voice that curiosity at all.]
[Sighing in tired exasperation, he settled his glasses on top of his head.]
I've been...really stupid lately, back at home. I got it stuck in my head that I had to deal with everything myself rather than put anyone else at risk, and it almost killed me. I guess I'm just...trying to remind myself how futile that is.
[There's a soft "Hm" in acknowledgement. Maybe with a hint of disappointment, but not shown. Just deep within him despite not having the right to feel it. Or perhaps knowing how he was at his worst and feeling it at himself.]
I... understand. Frequently on my journeys was I reminded that I was not alone. Still, the majority of burden fell upon me and I would do all I could to keep it away from everyone else. [For a man who despised being alone, he isolated in his own way more than he knew.]
If we still have the means to take another's hand that is how we will stand again. So long as you know that now, you will prevail in the future against whatever stands against you. [He had no idea how bad things were for Waver. But he wanted to believe. This deeply pessimistic Au Ra wanted so hard to believe.]
[He laughed softly, in a tired and resigned sort of way.]
That's almost exactly what Diarmuid said.
[No matter how he tried to withdraw, his Servant could always find a way to see straight through him. Past the armor of iron and mask of ice to the terrified child still hidden beneath it.]
'What requires a powerful resolve is to reach out and admit you can not stand alone. True courage lies in trusting those who reach back to pull you to your feet that you may continue forward.'
[That wasn't intentional... he'd only heard about the man through Waver. Didn't have much of a clue who he was outside of the visions in Comhartha Mionn. Takame was unsure if he should feel glad he thought the same way as such an impressive man or simply unworthy of the comparison.]
He words ring true, regardless. [He fidgeted with his bangs a little, brushing the gesture off as moving them out of his face.]
He becomes more impressive the more I hear of him.
You're right, and so is he. It's...something I needed to be convinced of, but it needs saying all the more because of that.
[He should have known better, but the poison of living as a mage was something without an easy antidote.]
He's...a Saber, now. Without any of the firsthand memories of having been Lancer, which has been a weird situation all around. [Reaching into a pocket of his coat, Waver took out a small photograph.] But he's...just the same as he's ever been, more or less.
... [He turned the photo around to show Takame when questioned; while the scenery was that of a Japanese-style training dojo largely left to dust and disrepair, the two figures within it were simply talking with no concern for the conditions. One was Waver exactly as he looked at present; tired, a little embarrassed, but very much himself. And beside him was someone familiar yet different, speaking with a confident and patient smile.]
Wound up getting my picture taken with a weird enchanted camera around here, and that's what came out. Looks like it's from a couple days before I got back to this world, just before everything went straight to hell and back again.
I see. [An enchanted camera is the least surprising thing he's heard of here. But seeing the photo he wasn't sure how he felt. When multitudes of emotions came over him it was more of a struggle to identify one.]
That's him with you? Diarmuid. [Takame saw him as Lancer in the illusions, but this was him as Saber. Certainly both visions and pictures paled in comparison to the real thing, but Takame saw... the same man. Something about him despite being dressed different, handsome, confident and chivalrous, came across in both.
Diarmuid was stunningly handsome, but more importantly to Takame...]
Yeah. It's a different incarnation, but that hasn't changed much about him.
[He turned slightly red, not bothering to make an effort to hide it.]
We were mostly just talking, really. I was trying to refine a last-ditch sneak attack, and he was encouraging my technique. It was the most normal conversation we'd probably had since I summoned him again. So of course I was content, I-...
[Quickly turning more than 'slightly' red and determinedly ignoring the fact.]
[Well, if Takame noticed how tomato red his friend got he didn't mention it aloud. And yet there's a few quiet huffs from Takame. The echoes of a genuine chuckle purely meant to express fondness more than amusement.
Even someone as stunted as Takame could tell how deeply Waver loved this man. Or perhaps because Takame had a love of his own he could tell? He wasn't sure. What he was sure of was how much he wanted to support this, no matter what fate had in store.
There was a soft smile on his face.]
I am glad you have this photograph. I imagine it means a great deal to have some way to see him.
...heh. You're definitely not going to hear me argue about that. [Pocketing the photograph again, he tugged on a small chain around his neck to draw out a small ivory pendant of his own.]
Afraid I'm really just a sentimental bastard, despite everything.
Mm. I'm much the same, I confess. [Said twirling the ring around the chain before letting it against his chest again.]
This ring belongs to my sister. I was grateful to have it returned to me in April. [The less said about that month the better, but present tense in reference to his family was a good sign.]
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[He shrugged, adjusting his sunglasses with an embarrassed smile.]
Is it that obvious?
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[Zhian had come so far she taught him how to properly defend even. He was proud of her and missed her dearly...]
Mm. It is difficult to explain, but you seem to be in a better mood since taking this on. So, I will give everything I have to make this a success. For you and those who will benefit from it.
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[His marked right hand fidgeted slightly as he dropped it from his face.]
I want this to go well. I believe that it will and I'm excited to be able to teach under my real name for once. It's only...I just want to do something that isn't 'catastrophically fuck up', which is the majority of what I've been doing back home lately.
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Still...]
You will succeed. You are qualified to handle something like this, you have the experience and the good judgment to know who and what will benefit students. You have the knowledge of both magic and life practice that anyone new to the supernatural would require.
I do not consider myself anyone... relevant. [Even in his world, he was just a meaningless ronin and his title of Warrior of Light felt undeserved.] But I believe in you, Waver.
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[Waver frowned, picking up his cane long enough to lightly tap the handle against Takame's chest in mock admonishment.]
Don't be absurd. Memory or not, you had the strength to stand against Lancelot and the courage to try regardless. You were right there with me doing that stupid shit with the Metaverse so no one else would have to get hurt. I've never seen you be anything but supportive and protective towards those in need of it since I met you. I of all people don't give a fuck about relevance--that doesn't measure anything worthwhile.
[After all, he was born worthless--and where had he ended up? With the undying loyalty of a hero, with all the power of the one who had so coldly written him off, and the resolve to try to protect the world.]
[...That meant something. He was sure enough of that much, now.]
What matters is intent, and things like experience and judgment will follow with the time taken to learn them. I can't do this alone, and I believe in you to help others learn what I can't teach them. If you're uneasy about that, fine--but know you don't have anything to fear so long as you approach this with the same wholehearted compassion I've seen from you time and time again.
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[A mock admonishment was still enough to briefly scare Takame. Did he say something wrong? Did he offend? His tail stiffened completely until the actual intent was shared.
He did listen, tail returning to a natural sway the more Waver spoke. Takame had meant to lift Waver up, he didn't realize he'd said something about himself that would make him need that.]
I was...
cw: implications of past abuse
But here they were, picking one another up. And the thought in Takame's mind of how brilliant a Scion Waver would be came to mind again. Takame wanted desperately to be a good person, even if it wouldn't erase the bad he's done.
He's always carried genuine intent to help, even if he'd didn't think to describe it as "compassion". First it was his sister's wish and its become his own. He would try to hold the kind words he received close that one day he could believe them. Regardless of whether he could or not, though...]
Throughout my life, everything I have committed to has been given every ounce of my effort and power. You can be certain that it will be the same here.
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[He spoke with a small, genuine smile--perhaps more sincere for its astounding rarity.]
We'll back each other up on this and play it by ear as it goes along. But I'm absolutely certain you don't have anything to worry about where commitment's concerned. The rest should fall into place after that.
That's about how it worked out for me, and there's not even anyone out to kill us here. Easy, right?
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Indeed. What we cannot manage alone can be done together. I will... be relying on you. And you may rely on me as well. [Said extending his hand. They were already working together, but something to... solidify it in a way. A means to say "here's to the future."]
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[All that matters is seeing this through to the end, you can easily do that without me.]
[Foolish. In striving to wear the iron armor of a mage around a human heart, he had utterly failed to understand that his missteps were their missteps. That it wasn't weakness to be unable to take every single thing on one's own shoulders, and it was not failure to stumble along the way.]
[You need not fight alone any longer, said a too-recent memory. And...was that really okay? Could he really stop himself from becoming that thing in that twisted dungeon? Stop himself from being like the silver-clad knight, or from the scarlet mage who commanded him?]
[...Maybe. But he was going to have to try to remember that it was no horrible transgression to take the offered hands to help him along the way.]
...Of course. [Having been briefly lost in thought, Waver seemed to shake something off before taking Takame's hand.] I...yeah. We'll figure it out together.
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Hm? Is there something on your mind?
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[Sighing in tired exasperation, he settled his glasses on top of his head.]
I've been...really stupid lately, back at home. I got it stuck in my head that I had to deal with everything myself rather than put anyone else at risk, and it almost killed me. I guess I'm just...trying to remind myself how futile that is.
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I... understand. Frequently on my journeys was I reminded that I was not alone. Still, the majority of burden fell upon me and I would do all I could to keep it away from everyone else. [For a man who despised being alone, he isolated in his own way more than he knew.]
If we still have the means to take another's hand that is how we will stand again. So long as you know that now, you will prevail in the future against whatever stands against you. [He had no idea how bad things were for Waver. But he wanted to believe. This deeply pessimistic Au Ra wanted so hard to believe.]
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[He laughed softly, in a tired and resigned sort of way.]
That's almost exactly what Diarmuid said.
[No matter how he tried to withdraw, his Servant could always find a way to see straight through him. Past the armor of iron and mask of ice to the terrified child still hidden beneath it.]
'What requires a powerful resolve is to reach out and admit you can not stand alone. True courage lies in trusting those who reach back to pull you to your feet that you may continue forward.'
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[That wasn't intentional... he'd only heard about the man through Waver. Didn't have much of a clue who he was outside of the visions in Comhartha Mionn. Takame was unsure if he should feel glad he thought the same way as such an impressive man or simply unworthy of the comparison.]
He words ring true, regardless. [He fidgeted with his bangs a little, brushing the gesture off as moving them out of his face.]
He becomes more impressive the more I hear of him.
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[He should have known better, but the poison of living as a mage was something without an easy antidote.]
He's...a Saber, now. Without any of the firsthand memories of having been Lancer, which has been a weird situation all around. [Reaching into a pocket of his coat, Waver took out a small photograph.] But he's...just the same as he's ever been, more or less.
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[Heavens knew they both needed it. With another tilt of his head his eyes focused on the photo he took out.]
Hm? [He wouldn't look without permission, but.]
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Wound up getting my picture taken with a weird enchanted camera around here, and that's what came out. Looks like it's from a couple days before I got back to this world, just before everything went straight to hell and back again.
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That's him with you? Diarmuid. [Takame saw him as Lancer in the illusions, but this was him as Saber. Certainly both visions and pictures paled in comparison to the real thing, but Takame saw... the same man. Something about him despite being dressed different, handsome, confident and chivalrous, came across in both.
Diarmuid was stunningly handsome, but more importantly to Takame...]
You seem quite content in this picture.
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[He turned slightly red, not bothering to make an effort to hide it.]
We were mostly just talking, really. I was trying to refine a last-ditch sneak attack, and he was encouraging my technique. It was the most normal conversation we'd probably had since I summoned him again. So of course I was content, I-...
[Quickly turning more than 'slightly' red and determinedly ignoring the fact.]
...I'm in love with him.
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Even someone as stunted as Takame could tell how deeply Waver loved this man. Or perhaps because Takame had a love of his own he could tell? He wasn't sure. What he was sure of was how much he wanted to support this, no matter what fate had in store.
There was a soft smile on his face.]
I am glad you have this photograph. I imagine it means a great deal to have some way to see him.
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...Yeah. It--....there wasn't anything like this last time, and correcting that wasn't high on my list of current priorities. So it's...nice.
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He fiddled with something under his collar, bringing out a plain, worn down silver ring hanging off of a leather necklace.]
It is. Having something from home that reminds us of those who brought us this far and the reasons we continue onward.
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Afraid I'm really just a sentimental bastard, despite everything.
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This ring belongs to my sister. I was grateful to have it returned to me in April. [The less said about that month the better, but present tense in reference to his family was a good sign.]
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